Having discovered something of the abundance that exists within oneself, a person quickly becomes able to appreciate something of the abundance in another. This next place that we’ll visit on our journey is to explore our relationships—how we interact one with another, and what drives our didactic dynamics—both those of abundance, and those of scarcity.
Even from this early point in our voyage, we might begin to imagine how one abundantly-aware person might relate to another abundantly-aware person. In our mind’s eye we might see such a relationship as a beautiful, unrehearsed dance—a dance in which both people move and interact according to their own awareness of the essence of life flowing within them and between them.
It’s a nice image, but it may not seem very realistic from our current point of view. Our difficulty with such an image is not due to its improbability, as much as the fact that our own experiences and expectations have mostly been so much less abundant.
Ordinarily, the dance of human interaction moves very tentatively, perhaps even in a contrived way. People are usually very aware of how easily they’ve been hurt before. Because none of us are strangers to pain, we like to keep our sore spots covered and try not to repeat any of our previous mistakes.
Our human instinct for survival is strong. It keeps us going even through great frustrations. Yet, the same perspective that serves to help us survive can keep us tied to beliefs that limit what our relationships can be. To understand this connection, we will examine how one’s perspective effects the experience of family, friend, and love relationships. Through our exploration we will uncover the awareness that allows a deeper, and more abundant, experience for individuals engaged in the dance of relationship.
The Earliest Relationships
As children, we are not innately aware of the restrictions of our world. At birth, humans hold no concepts of scarcity. We learn about such things gradually, and only through much training. As children, humans naturally understand all about things like magic, wonder, awe, and love. One need only look into the face and eyes of an infant for a moment to know that this is true. We are all born knowing the consciousness of abundance—with no training required, little humans are the very embodiment of such things.
No parent intentionally teaches a child about owning a perspective of limitation. Rather, parents are most interested in teaching their children about the best ways to get along in life. Parents aim to teach children how to survive and function in the world. This is very necessary, for the raw biological impulses that make up the normal functions of a human body must be gently tamed and socialized. Children need to know as much as possible about all the rules of living in this world. Through the process of growing up we learn how to get our needs satisfied in socially acceptable ways, by also learning to understand and appreciate the needs and concerns of other people.
However, as children learning to survive in the world, humans unknowingly neglect and gradually forget their connections with what is deeper. In learning to focus upon the conditions which envelope us externally, we lose touch with the true essence of our being. We learn to be practical, logical, linear, predictable, and to focus upon the mundane concerns of everyday life. A little sad? — Yes! However, very necessary for our early survival.
Unfortunately, besides all the practical stuff which parents intentionally teach their children, there is also an enormous amount of survivalistic training which parents give unintentionally. Even the most loving parent can’t anticipate and meet every need of a child. Parents generally do the best they can. Despite this, children learn that there are sometimes limits and conditions upon the love they receive.
Understandably, there are limits upon time—and parents have only so much energy and only so much attention to devote to their children. Parents, being human, have only so much patience and understanding. Even under the very best of conditions, sometimes parents and their children will have priorities that differ. Learning to cope with such situations teaches a child much about dealing with restrictions in the process of satisfying his or her own needs.
In those cases where the priorities of a parent and child are chronically disparate (i.e. neglect, abuse) the restrictive message given to a child is all the more limiting. To the child, a parent is God. When there is any lack or difficulty, children easily assume that they, themselves, are the source of the problem. This contributes to a distorted self-image in children, and to a restricted view of their surrounding world.
Most parents, due to their training and experience, are mainly unaware of the great potentials that exist within the consciousness of every being. Remember, that the definition of Deep Freedom is to act only out of the sense of what is most correct from the depths of one’s heart. The concerns of the heart are deeper and more subtle than the priorities of mere survival. A primary concern with survival requires a focus upon only what is most superficially needed for subsistence. Under these conditions the more profound priorities of the heart easily become forgotten.
A parent living according to his or her concerns with survival impresses a perspective of scarcity upon the awareness of a developing child. As children, we learn to function primarily by conforming to the all the expectations of the external world (most especially those of our family), including everything spoken, as well as, every value and idea demonstrated by action.
Children are highly adaptive. We are all born with instincts and sensitivities that allow us to eventually mold ourselves to the demands of our environment. Within the first few years of life, human children develop language, social, and cognitive abilities suited to their specific conditions in life. All the time, a child is learning how to fit itself into the functional demands of his or her surroundings. Because the focus is necessarily upon the external, each new generation gradually forgets its connection with its own essence. Ultimately, what seems most important to us—even our sense of identity—may come to be defined mainly in terms of the outward conditions of living.
Due to a heavy emphasis upon conformity for the sake of biological survival, life can become an operation in fulfilling the expectations of the external world. When our priorities favor external conditions, family and social dynamics easily become reduced to rigid, predictable patterns that support the outward circumstances of life. Individuals may take on inflexible roles to conform with these rigid patterns. Such roles include: achiever, counselor, helper, entertainer, pleaser, weakling, dominator, arguer, peace-maker, sage, fool, provider, user, professor, repressor, enabler, etc.
Though no role, in and of itself, is unhealthy—and when flexible, roles do serve practical purposes for the functioning of healthy relationships—it is most important to be mindful that every role is no more than an adaptation of only a small part of any person’s deeper identity.
Now, in situations where severe abuse or other threats to survival are present, it may be easy to understand how rigid patterns, and roles, develop and function. Life in a ‘war zone’ doesn’t allow for much flexibility. However, it may be harder for us to recognize such dynamics at work in families and social situations where people are not as harshly oriented to mere survival.
For example, consider a person who came from a solid environment, having been raised by two loving parents. Let’s assume this person got a lot of parental support, at least in the areas where one, or both, parents knew how to provide support. Let’s also say this person grew up healthy, got an education, and established a successful, respectable life. There would seem to be no problem here—indeed, no other conclusion need be drawn. Unless, there is some unexpressed need in this person to be something different than what his or her external conditions support.
Only the individual, in one’s own heart, is capable of knowing if the life one lives is truly an expression of his or her essence. This can only be discerned by developing a relationship with the larger and deeper parts of the self. Without such self-knowledge, a person would never really know to what degree one’s life is an authentically free expression of his or her essence.
Knowing the Larger Self
You begin to know your Larger Self when you establish an open, intimate relationship with yourself. The relationship exists when you know and care about what matters to you deep inside. This connection is the result of the most vigorous honesty; honesty with oneself. Knowing your Larger Self allows you to find what is most true for you. It is a most necessary step on the path to Deep Freedom, for it will reveal to you what it means to be authentically yourself.
The great challenge that exists for such self-discovery is that nothing in one’s externally oriented view of life is capable of encouraging it. Scarcity consciousness says, “I really don’t have the time, the energy, or the ability to form this kind of connection with myself—maybe I need a degree in psychology first.” Scarcity fearfully tells us, “There may be a lot of scary and uncomfortable things I’ll have to face about myself; I don’t know if I want to take that on.” And if that doesn’t work, scarcity will suggest, “If I find something unexpected inside of me, maybe I’ll have to change my life—maybe my friends will all say I’m crazy.” Scarcity consciousness limits not only our means to know the self, but also limits how much value we see in self-understanding.
Abundance consciousness tells us that the Larger Self is like an ocean. Everything in, and upon, the ocean is an aspect of one’s being. The Larger Self knows that what a person ordinarily thinks of as one’s identity, and all the frequently used roles that are part of it, are something like a small ‘life raft’ floating upon the surface of the ‘ocean of being’. The ‘life raft’ is an important part of one’s being, but not the most significant part, and definitely not the most central part.
Knowing one’s Larger Self allows a person to experience his or her life from a profoundly different perspective. The Larger Self knows all about the currents which move around the ‘life raft of identity’. It knows what is happening far below the surface of the water, and sees far beyond the short horizon viewed from the ‘life raft’. Knowing the Larger Self gives a person access to boundless resources of understanding and awareness that are just not accessible with the ‘life raft’ perspective of identity.
In knowing the Larger Self, one is connecting again with the awareness that knew the wonder of life, as a child. The aspect of your awareness that naturally understood abundance when you were a child, lives on always inside your heart. Yet, knowing the Larger Self is not just recapturing the perspective of the innocent child, it has much more meaning than that. It is easy to understand abundance as a child—it is only natural. However, it is a great accomplishment to travel through an entire life immersed in survival and limitation and still be able to recognize and honor something that has become virtually invisible. The achievement is high because the connection with the Larger Self is only found through the heart, and it is very difficult to listen to the quiet whispers of the heart over the noisy distractions of a world driven by scarcity.
A very simple way to concretely establish a connection with the Larger Self is to acknowledge your deepest aspirations. This can be accomplished very easily by completing the following exercise.
Exercise 2a Exploring Your Aspirations
One of the very easiest ways to begin to know your Larger Self is to take inventory of, and record, all the things you would deeply love to experience in your life. This is an opportunity to acknowledge all your aspirations and the contents of your fondest wishes and dreams.
Get a pen and several sheets of paper before starting. Begin by taking a few minutes to become relaxed and quiet. (If you would like a process to use for relaxation refer to the exercise given at the end of the first chapter.)
When you are ready, make a list of all the things which you would like to experience or accomplish during the span of your lifetime. Don’t exclude anything that comes into your awareness, no matter how trivial or mundane. Likewise, don’t exclude anything that seems improbable or too difficult from your current perspective. Don’t worry about how realistic any part of the list may seem. Age is no concern. Neither is time, nor money. Don’t judge anything; just express whatever comes to you.
As you do this exercise, you are engaging in a process to honor what comes to you from deep inside. Don’t be surprised if you end up listing some items which never consciously occurred to you before. This can indicate that you are contacting parts of yourself which ordinarily do not get expressed. Exploration of this kind, helps the process of connecting with your Larger Self.
When the list seems complete, take a moment to choose at least one item that you would like to accomplish right away. Circle the item(s) and acknowledge to yourself that whatever you have circled holds a high priority on your list of aspirations. This doesn’t mean that you can’t change the list or your priorities. It is simply an acknowledgment of what has meaning for you presently.
Keep the list for future reference. You may be surprised how helpful it can be to record and keep track of your goals. Acknowledge your achievements as you accomplish each one. Add to the list or subtract items as you like, but don’t remove anything just because it doesn’t seem likely. Allow yourself to believe in a little magic!
Learning to Dance
Learning to function in all the different relationships of life is rather like learning to dance to a wide variety of different music. We learn one set of dance steps for our family, another for our school teachers. We learn a entirely different style with our peers, one that can change wildly and often. Some institutions, like our religions, keep alive the very oldest of dance combinations. Others, like most of our government institutions, may like to require of us a song, as well as a dance.
Everybody has a different idea of how we should be dancing. It seems very important when we are growing up to pay attention to all these different dance teachers, because many of the ‘ballrooms of life’ won’t even allow us on their floor unless we can perform their preferred local jig. Every new situation speaks the subtle message, “In order to obtain what you need, or even gain acceptance, you must first satisfactorily perform the required prance and shuffle.” Out of necessity, we all learn to dance expertly to other people’s favorite music.
The problem which inevitably arises from this situation is that in being so involved in moving according to everyone else’s expectations, a person doesn’t discover how to dance to his or her own tune. One’s own personal song is always playing in the depths of one’s heart. The Larger Self always hears that song. Even while a person is oblivious to the song of one’s heart, the deeper aspects of self wait, and hope, to be eventually discovered. This situation creates a subtle longing in a person; a quiet heart-ache, which is intended to attract one’s attention to what is going on inside. However, with the externalized focus that comes with survival consciousness, all of one’s aches and discomforts are attributed to causes and conditions of the outer world. With that, the ‘song of the heart’ becomes perceived as just another ill-defined source of discomfort—another pain to be avoided.
The original intention of ‘learning to dance’ is to become able to function and survive in the world. Every movement of every ‘dance of survival’ has a subtle, underlying purpose of helping a person to indirectly fulfill the needs of biological existence.
The same perspective (scarcity consciousness) which infers that this is so necessary, also keeps us dependent upon performing these ‘dances of survival’. Scarcity requires a full, unending attention to the demands of the external world. Scarcity reasons that the only way our survival can be assured is by learning all the movements to all the ‘songs of life’—but in practicality, only the very loudest melodies ever capture the attention of the person who is frantically dancing for his or her very survival.
All this dancing can make a person very tired. There are ever so many new steps to learn, and so many variations on the steps we learned long ago. Every time we turn around there is some new song that demands our attention. Each new situation requires some added personal commitment in exchange for supplying a little more of what we need to survive. The tunes play on and on, and people endlessly put their energy toward dancing to everything they hear.
When the fray becomes too overwhelming and the demands of the external world are too great, a person could take refuge by retreating to some activity guided by the priorities of one’s own heart. Listening to the ‘song of the heart’ will always bring a being back to a place of balance and peace. However, if no relationship has ever been cultivated with the Larger Self, a person might not even be aware of his or her own heart’s melody. In such a case, there exists no apparent choice for relief from all the noise of the external world. Under such a situation, scarcity eventually drives the person further and further toward the limits of physical, emotional, and spiritual exhaustion.
Being in an exhausted state allows a person to become consumed with concerns related to survival. Exhaustion is a completely out-of-balance state, where a person can easily become fixated and stuck upon unhealthful patterns of living, thinking, and feeling. Fixated behavior can take almost any form, and it will vary with each individual’s beliefs and predisposition. Fixated patterns will often show up in every significant relationship of a person’s life, depending upon the survival-oriented priorities of all the involved persons. The possible variations of this dance called the ‘Fixation-Shuffle’ are endless.
Fixated patterns are the natural result of struggling to cope with the myriad challenges of the survivalistic life, while focusing only upon the management of external factors. Exhausted persons have become overloaded by the demands of their lives. The pressure can put a person into a slow, downward spiral. The pains of the outer world become joined by the constant ache from a heart who’s song is never heard. No manipulation of external factors alone will ever completely relieve the discomfort of any person, much less one who has become exhausted. The vicious cycle can only continue, and the situation will gradually deteriorate until the affected person realizes the need to make a change within his or her perspective.
With scarcity, the thing which speaks the loudest is very rarely the heart. Rather, one only hears the muddled echoes of the expectations of every extraneous source of influence. With scarcity, people act compulsively, because the only songs they hear are the blaring tunes of the external world compelling them to conform to an unending list of superficial urgings. A person does not learn how to dance freely to the ‘song of the heart’ until concerns with survival become less important than knowing what it means to be truly, and deeply, alive.
Relationships Beyond Scarcity
All of a person’s patterns and fixations concerning survival are naturally carried over into all the relationships in which one participates, though not intentionally, of course. Most humans would love to be able to forget all their past negative experiences when starting a new friendship, however, the entirety of one’s being and experience always comes right along for the ride, no matter how much we may wish otherwise.
In the beginning of a new relationship, it can be easy to get caught up in the largeness of all our feelings inside. Hearts seem to open wide, and sing loudly. It seems easy to know and share our dreams and aspirations. One feels free, and very alive.
However, when scarcity is operating, this newness cannot last for long. Scarcity tell us, “Happiness does exist, but only in limited situations, and only under precise conditions.” Soon, a person begins to become very conscious of his or her unfulfilled needs. He or she may also begin to remember the difficulties and mistakes of old relationships. Gradually, the imperfections of the new relationship will become more obvious, reminding one of similar defects of character in other situations of days long gone.
With scarcity, a pattern that often comes into play is to begin to think in terms of ‘if only’. Scarcity says, “I know I could get along with person ‘if only’ he or she could be more considerate!” One’s acceptance of the relationship, and the other person, becomes conditional upon the other person meeting the standards of some ‘minimum requirement’. This superficial standard of this ‘minimum requirement’ could involve anything: affection, attention, punctuality, etc. The list of conditions will likely change with time and with different partners. The requirement will likely involve exactly what one perceives is most lacking in the other person.
However, the importance of such requirements has very little to do with the other person upon whom they are focused. Rather, it has everything to do with one’s very own beliefs about relationships. Whether aware of it, or not, if a person has a belief that good relationships are rare, or that one’s happiness is contingent upon the perfection of another person, the chances are extremely low that he or she can feel happy with any partner. Even if the other person were successful at exceeding the ‘minimum requirement’, some new set of conditions would likely replace it. This pattern is one of paying most attention to what is lacking in the self, the other, the relationship, and then trying to avoid the pain caused by those perceived insufficiencies. Until the underlying perspective is discovered and modified one would likely never feel truly fulfilled by any relationship.
The other person in this scenario, however, is not just an innocent victim. He or she may be accommodating the situation because of a need for attention, approval, or the fulfillment of some other basic need. The variations on this type of interaction are endless, but they all have a common underlying dynamic: scarcity consciousness suggests that we, as individuals, and all our potential friends and partners, are very limited in our capacity for love—both giving it and receiving it.
Scarcity says there is a severe limit to the supply of love. Scarcity seems to make human beings into love scavengers—people who will to go to any length for even a scrap of approval or attention. However, when participating in a relationship driven by scarcity people are not sharing love, so much as they are engaging in concessions and transactions to obtain fulfillment of their most basic needs. Scarcity puts human interactions into a mode where all involved parties endlessly strive to do their best ‘dances of survival’ in the hope of fulfilling their needs for safety, security, comfort, etc.
Real love is shared only when a person acts according to the awareness of his or her heart. The wisdom of the heart is not available when scarcity and survival concerns are operating. Scarcity fools people into believing that their survivalistic urges are the true objectives of their hearts’ content. However, real intimacy is an act of honoring your essence—honoring that which has deepest importance, not just what is most superficially needed. Real love and closeness come only with an abundant perspective that knows how the open heart flows with a boundless supply of what is needed to care for the self, the other, and the relationship.
Deep Freedom does not fit with a survivalistic pattern for relationships. How free can anyone be while conforming to an endless list of requirements necessary to satisfy every external standard?—Not very free, obviously! Humans have accepted this circumstance for ages by believing that a commitment to relationship requires self-sacrifice. People expect that their own will should naturally become subject to the needs of the other person and the bond between both of them. We might accurately visualize the traditional concept of relationship by imagining two ‘life rafts’ being crudely lashed together, bound tightly with cords out of the fear that the currents and storms of life might otherwise pull them apart. This perspective is blind to the truth that every friendship and love relationship is more like the melding of two entire oceans.
Real intimacy is a sharing between people of what is truly going on within the depths of their beings. This open exchange is a part of every healthy friendship and love relationship. The deeper the bonds between people, the more they reveal to each other—that is, up to the limit of what each person defines as the boundary of his or her personal identity. When one sees personal identity as the ‘life raft’, the limits upon what a person can intimately reveal are severe—the scene may include only meager survival rations, a personal flotation device, and if you’re lucky, maybe a flaregun (only to be used in emergencies!). However, by learning to know the Larger Self, identity can include every aspect of the ‘ocean of being’—any vessel upon the surface (or below), any creature in the sea, the waves, the storms, the calm, the depths, even the ocean’s great vastness.
When we relate to each other only in terms of the ‘life raft’ aspects of identity, it is very easy to quickly assume that we understand everything there is to know about one another. We begin to believe that nothing will ever surprise us because we know the dimensions and contents of each other’s ‘little rubber boats’. It can become quite easy to take one another for granted. However, when we relate in terms of the Larger Self every moment of every relationship becomes a potentially bright, new experience. Indeed, the vastness of the ‘ocean of being’ is so great that one could spend an eternity exploring it and never know it completely.
Osho, an authority on the enormity and intricacy of human consciousness, once explained that every new experience brings about a profound change in the totality of each being. So great is this change that every person becomes completely new in every moment. Only with the perspective of the Larger Self can we begin to really appreciate the beauty of every being, and the great potentials that exist for all of our relationships.
Our ideals for love and intimacy often suggest that close relationships are best when built of kindness, patience, understanding, and authenticity. The demands of a world driven by the priorities of scarcity makes such things very rare. Concerns with survival cause people to carefully ration their resources; the energy they have left over for their friends and loved ones usually doesn’t allow for much generosity. With scarcity, close relationships are often seen as just another situation where one’s personal vitality becomes drained and sucked away.
However, this is not true when one begins to experience relationships in terms of the Larger Self. The ‘ocean of being’ contains the boundless resources that make the ideals for intimacy a reality. From this perspective, relationships need no longer bleed away one’s energy, rather, intimacy becomes a place where we share our bounty and thereby re-vitalize one another. Abundant relationships return more energy than what is invested in them, and they become a great source of power for every being who is touched by them.
Real intimacy is only possible with a perspective of abundance. Intimacy means to share with another the depth of what has truth for you. Scarcity can neither perceive, nor support, the depth of one’s truth—it has too much concern for what is superficial, external, and limited.
It has been said by many, that if you love something you should set it free. Begin with yourself, and know that by doing so you ultimately assist every other being to know its own most beautiful and sacred self. Then, not only will you be able to dance to the song of your own heart, but you will know what it is to dance freely with another. In the dance of relationship, may you know the continual re-creation of the universe of yourself.
Care for Exhaustion and Fixation
There are times when every person becomes stretched beyond the limits of his or her capacity to cope. Some such experiences may be only short lived; either the straining circumstances pass quickly, or perhaps one is able to quickly locate and use available resources to gain additional strength to overcome the stress.
When strain lasts longer, or becomes chronic, it is an indication that the usual resources for handling stress and the normal patterns of living are not sufficient to nurture the individual. Indeed, the known ways of handling problems are undoubtedly adding more pressure to an already difficult situation. If the load of self-imposed and environmental demands upon a person only seem to ever get heavier and heavier, something eventually is going to give. With chronic stress, exhaustion is quite common.
A big problem with exhaustion is that it can be difficult to self-detect. The body will adapt to chronic stress by increasing the thresholds of discomfort to allow greater function under adverse conditions. This is a natural survival mechanism. For example, if you work long hours and never seem to get enough rest, your body will adapt and get by with less rest. This does not mean, however, that your body no longer needs the usual amount of rest. Rather, it means that your body is working in a kind of emergency survival mode that allows you to function with less than what you really need; you are living at a level sufficient for survival, but a level somewhere below what is required for optimal functioning. In a chronic, semi-exhausted state a person is primarily concerned with meeting only the minimum required levels of functioning for survival. It is possible for the exhausted person to assume that no problem exists and no corrective action is needed.
Fixations develop very easily when one is in an exhausted state. Because the concern is upon the minimum requirements for survival, any elements in the environment which appear connected with survival (or pain reduction) will get the most attention. Fixations can develop into obsessive patterns depending both upon a person’s predisposition, and the level of survivalistic pressures upon the individual.
Proper care and healing for exhaustion and fixations must involve attention to both the personal predisposition and survivalistic stress. Individual and group therapy, support groups, problem-specific treatment programs, spiritual practice/study, and even self-help books are all possible elements of a program to restore balance to the life of person working to recover from survivalistic fixations. Ultimately, however, a path of healing and growth will be most effective to the degree that it brings the individual to a larger view of the self. Only by finding an abundant view of identity, and life, can a person truly let go of all the tired, fixated, and restricted patterns in one’s existence.
Exercise 2b Identity and Relationship Dynamics
The way one views the limits and contents of personal identity will have a profound impact upon the shape, dynamics, and potential of every relationship. A very restricted sense of identity allows only a very restricted range of possible intimate experiences. The more a person can expand his or her self-knowledge, the greater the potential range and depth of every relationship.
The object of this exercise is to become mindful of the survival-oriented aspects of identity, as well as the aspects of the Larger Self which have shown themselves in different relationships throughout one’s life of experiences.
Gather several clean pieces of paper and a pen before you begin. Start by getting comfortable in a quiet place where you can reflect and make notes. Take some deep breaths, relax your body, and pay attention the feelings of your body as you breath.
Recall a relationship, with any friend, lover, or family member that you consider to have been difficult; a circumstance that required your continual strenuous effort. Remember how it felt, and significant events that occurred. Recall how it began and how it ended. At the top of the first sheet of paper, write a brief description of the situation. Then list down the page the different aspects of your identity that were emphasized through the events, like what roles you played, what responsibilities you assumed, what labels were placed upon you by yourself and others. When finished with the list put it aside.
Next, get yourself fully relaxed again. This time, recall a relationship that seemed mostly effortless and joyful. Record a description of the situation at the top of the second sheet, and below as before, make a list of what parts of you were expressed through this happier set of events.
When finished writing, look at both lists. As you compare them, do you notice any difference in the description of the part you played in these contrasting situations? What can you say about the kinds of feelings you remember from these different relationships? Are there parts of you that you liked more in either of the situations? Where, if at all, did it feel like you were being encouraged to discover and express your Larger Self, your heart?
Relationships are somewhat like the proving ground for all the important lessons we learn about life. It is one thing to cognitively understand some principle, it is quite another to successfully apply it within the intricacies of human interactions. Relationships tell us much about what we have already discovered upon the journey to Deep Freedom. They can also indicate the best direction to take as we continue on the voyage of our life’s exploration.
Go to Chapter 3: Circumnavigating a Flat World
New Consciousness Rising